Happy Birthday to me!

Okay, first things first, I'm grovelling on my knees to all of you who have faithfully checked this blog during months and months of inactivity! Not that I didn't want to be blogging, and many times composed posts that were never written, but one day leads to another in this resetting up our life process, and blogging just never gets to the top of the list. Not to mention that this includes also doing some rearranging emotionally and mentally, and sometimes that gives me writer's block. Yes, we are all fine, and good actually. Tio is 10 crawling, standing, teethy-grinning baby months old already! Sage, Kai and Lucas are three brown,(the line between dirt and sun is questionable:), happy, very busy boys, and the other boy, Kenji is a very busy man actually-remodelling the house we bought at all hours of the day, while trying to fit in work at my mom's bowling alley where he's learning maintenance on the bowling machines and enjoying working in such an environment, and of course being a daddy, not to mention helping a contractor friend for extra money on some weekends, back in our old hometown of Columbia. Occasionally casting a line in my parents' lake, oh, and tonight "cooking me a years' worth of a meal, so he'll be caught up". His back tightens up a few times a week and he'll need to take something to relax it, but it's so much improved, for which we are so thankful. I'm being mommy, what else would I be! And working at my old hospital Boone, in Columbia, a few shifts a month, while getting to stay with my sister and her family who live there, and occasionally visit friends. It sort of feels like a treat to me, while my family and Kenji keep all the boys:). We did swimming lessons this summer, Sage and Kai did wonderful and had a blast at the local pool, while Lucas and Tio enjoyed the baby pool. And the numerous family gatherings, I love being able to be close enough to do these, as well as be involved in the church my dad pastors. The boys love going to Sunday school, and Sage and Kai enjoy having Grandma Velma teach them there.

We are living with my parents, along with my youngest sister, at my childhood home, what fun! And I'm not being sarcastic, my little sis has been gone from the area since she got out of high school, out in Rhode Island. I didn't expect to ever live close to her again, and I'm so excited. She's the owner of the diner in the bowling alley, and she's working very hard to make a go of it, which isn't a piece of cake in a small town. She does a book club there once a month, which she convinced me to join, it's rare that either one of us get the book finished, but it's fun anyway. Last night she helped the boys to clean out our old, spidery, dusty playhouse. It's great to have aunts!

My parents and the rest of the family have been overwhelmingly helpful, we couldn't be doing what we're attempting without them, that's for sure. We bought 30 acres of land and a house the end of May, finding what we wanted sooner than we expected. The house, although sturdy and really fitting our needs, does need to be completely remodeled on the inside, and that's what has mainly consumed us since then, although we have many sidetracks of course! Mostly good ones at least. I go whenever I can to help, sometimes more than others, usually I can at least make it after the kids go to bed, when the two of us go and work for a few hours. The house is about 15 min. from my parents. We love the location, it's almost a mile off the main road on a semi-private drive(we share with one neighbor further on down-and an awesome one at that). A big yard surrounded by trees, and so many things we were looking for that i won't go into right now. God has been good. We're trying to do everything we can ourselves, with putting in a wood floor maybe being the only thing we get someone else to do. We get help from friends frequently, which is so nice! Our initial goal was to get in by Sept. so we could have the chaos behind us and jump into homeschooling the boys when public school starts, we may not make it, but goals are meant to be broken right? Mom's house has had years of homeschooling, so I'm trying not to get too worried. Anyway, there's always learning going on here, just not official, ha!

So, in case you've been out of the loop, yes, we came back from our adventure in Japan April 10th, and it's been a whirlwind since. It's been great to see family and friends again. I had no idea how the move back would affect any of us, and I still haven't processed it all as of yet. The kids have seemed to seamlessly integrate back into life here. It helps of course, that they were coming back to something they knew. Living with my family has kept them busy in relationships and doing things so much that they haven't really had time to miss things too much in Japan, although we hear comments here and there(which I'm glad for), nothing to keep them down. I have found it somewhat difficult to reconcile the completely different life, this makes me appreciate what missionaries go through, who experience this to a much greater extent than we have of course! Not that I can't just slip right back into life here, after all it's what I've lived for years, it's more the fact that I CAN, that somehow bothers me, I do like to have some problem to chew on after all! Japan and our life there feels light years away already somehow, and I don't really like that. I am so involved in life here trying to get settled in that I can't reconnect much and of course, my main link, email, I can't use to communicate to my Japanese friends and family unless I use Kenji's services, and he's far too busy, which means I don't communicate much.

Anyway, I'm not trying to whine, we are very, very blessed, although sometimes, in the interest of honesty, I lose my focus and choose to do so...until something reminds me how blessed we have been and are, and I'm ashamed of complaining, which I should be!

This is why I don't do this very often....I just blab on and on; I was actually not posting to toot my own horn and get some birthday greetings!:) This is my present to me, to sit and make myself do what I really want to do, but keep putting off. Thanks to my mom I can pull it off. This post is more of a "get into it again", sort of thing, one of these days when I hook up our hard drive I'll get you some pictures. Kids, of course, house, cute, white, fluffy kitties and the dog who found us(more stories:),family....

Our birthday season has officially been kicked off, my birthday is the "first",as the kids like to say, then it's Kai, Lucas, Tio, Kenji, and then Sage who finishes up the season the end of November, just in time to think of Christmas:).
The kids are always very excited and my first gift is a "ruby" ring from the redemption counter in the game center at Jester's(the bowling alley/family entertainment center my parent's own with another couple and my mom manages)-it's from Kai, who looks very forward to birthdays, and according to my mom, saved up his tickets from earned tokens and knew just what he wanted to get me! He was so sweet, couldn't wait to give it to me this morning. He counts down for days to birthdays. They are with my mom and little niece at Jester's now, so I could have a few hours while Tio sleeps on my birthday-my mom is tireless and amazing, have I said that yet? Sage is picking out my present now I'm sure, he was upset that he didn't have time to do it the other day, because he went with me to pick out Kai's present! There have been lots of whisperings and "don't come in here mom!" lately, so I bet I have some special pictures coming too. I found a vase of wildflowers waiting outside for me, that came from Kenji, from our land,(he came home to take a shower and get rid of the seed ticks he got picking them-I'm putting two and two together now...) that's the best! And he didn't fail to get me my yearly splurge of dark chocolate and sour patch kids(remember those?, we used to go through a big box when we went to the movies together, aaah, those were the days:)that I hide and only rarely share with the kids-adult candy right? He presented them to me at the stroke of midnight as we were driving home from working on the house last night.

I'm 33 this year, which doesn't feel young or old....I remember my own mom turning 30 when I was 10, and thinking that she was getting old, so that does somewhat color my perception! (Funny, isn't it, how young she seems now!) In 33 years what have I been blessed with? A loving family, with all its' quirks... hmm,when I typed family, I remembered a recent conversation with a friend. We were talking about how we thought our families were so normal growing up, (and other people's were wierd!),but as we've gotten older, we see that there is no such thing. Every family has its own brand of pathologies/idiosyncrasies and although accepting that is tough sometimes, it's surely better to get it done and move on! Especially since seeing things how they are, in all their reality, is much healthier than a false picture...where am I going with this? I'm really getting off on a rabbit trail, I was talking about blessings...but this is kind of more interesting anyhow. I think I'm saying this because I have been forced to face my own weakness of building up an ideal image of what something is, instead of facing what's actually there and dealing with it, that would be too hard, wouldn't it? Ironically, controlling the facade is really much more difficult work and problematic. And not too fun....or interesting either. Doesn't leave much time or energy for more rewarding pursuits or relationships. Maybe, as I get older, I am/ will do more/ pray, that I can just take things as they are presented to me, not get in a hurry to see where they will take me, or how they will turn out. God needs to stay in business after all!

see you soon I hope, Heather

Ps. you know the blessings anyhow, right? But just in case...my four lively boys, my husband, who puts up with my exhausting cycle of ups and downs and freak outs, and still gives me flowers and chocolate:), my friends who put up with me not keeping in touch, being late, etc...,Many awesome people who love us, even though we give next to nothing back to them, Our trip to Japan, the friends and family we got to spend time with there, the experiences we had, and I hesitate here...both good and bad, just like the rest of life, and mostly that God is relentless in His pursuit of me, no matter how hard I run to get away, and try to somehow senselessly control what is out of my control(wow, is that a two-year old's sentiment or what! Don't let me complain when my kids do that...)and mess stuff up in the process. He is good and faithful, even when I am far from it. To Him be the glory forever and ever, Amen!